Timing

You have to admit..that sometimes, timing can be everything.

I learned a few years back, that you need to have a few things aligned to create a window of opportunity. This works both for work and for life in general.

Many years ago (vague obviously for a reason) I met this guy. I was in a slightly complicated stage in my life (well, more confused than complicated). He, on the other hand, was in a MORE complicated/confused state. A recipe for disaster.

The thing is it was all good.. Good friends, good times, good vibes, good laughs....
I have to say that if we were in a more lucid state, we would have either recognized the state of it all and maintained the friendship only, or taken it to a more steady level..but as timing had it..after all the dust settled, we had nothing, just a chasm and 'common' friends.

Within the past X years, we've seen each other here and there, exchanging quick hellos to keep up appearances, but anyone who knew us, must have noticed the change in status..and I have to say I felt the difference, and I would imagine he would have too. I'm sure he must have felt the fact that one of his best friends became mine too, possibly from his point of view, replacing him..but that wasn't the case.

I'm thankful that I met one through the other, but one surely doesn't equal the other...

I was angry for a time..because I felt jipped out of my friendship but after x years (and heavy discussions with significant others) i was already at the stage where I thought it was time to mend fences..but the opportunity wasn't there, and the timing was never right.

Life has been chaotic for the past few years..but things had started to settle again, and I was somewhat out of my 'cloud'

And so, recently, a window of opportunity presented itself, and it seemed, for both of us, the timing was right.

When I first got there I was wondering if we'd be able to sort things out this time round..I was there, he was there, with our friends. We said hello and I *think* he gave me a hug...We had dinner, we hit the town and went to some funky bars then we all had breakfast together. A few days later we also all had lunch, and what I thought might have been a one day fluke, wasn't. I figured, yeah, maybe we were okay again.

What really hit home with me was when he (and ofcourse his/my best friend) came over the night before I left (or was it two nights before?)..which was signature him, since the last time we were 'friends' he stayed til the sun came up, half asleep, talking and laughing.

At long last, we were friends again.

We didn't really talk about this until last week, when he saw me on ym, and said something about putting me in his little black book (he was asking for my details) and i said that I had already made it into that book..didn't I?

He asked if I had regrets, and I said no. Regrets about what? Us being friends? not at all. About the good steady friendship that we had? No way. About all the other things that complicated the already complicated situation? No.

Life is all about living and I have no regrets. He was (is) the best of friends...he would drive hours to come get me, and drive hours back to take me home. Everything was funny and he is one of the sweetest guys I have ever met in my life...
He apologized profusely, and I told him that there is nothing to say sorry about anymore...

You know how they say that time heals all wounds? It's not true. Though time is a factor, there are many other factors that you need to put in place to create your own window of opportunity...and forgiving yourself is one of those things as is forgiving other people.

We are only human.

And knowing all these things, talking about it to settle the issues and regaining my center?

Well, somehow, all that happened last week, and that, my friends, is timing.