Background music

The thing about background music is that its always there, in the back, waiting for you to listen to it. Then when you do, you would usually decide to either turn it off (if its some crappy song), change it (if you still want to listen) or continue listening to it.
Like in life..

I have recently realized that sometimes what ifs are better as what if nots..catch my drift? I have to be rather vague kase I don't want to hurt anyone just because I want to share how I feel. I actually wrote a frank blog about this on my other blogging thingy, which I will not share because its anonymous.

So even though my life has been one hell of a crappy rollercoaster ride these past 10 months..I've sorted so many things out about myself, my relationships and my state of mind that maybe, as the saying always goes, things happen for a reason. Ofcourse I would rather that Mich not have had an aneursym, and that my olds were happier...I guess we all have our hang ups.. and I would imagine my detractors saying " at last, ming has a problem, I always thought she was too happy to be real"..yeah, well I was happy..I am happy, or getting there anyway.
Back to the background music..as I said we all have options. For example, Exhibit A. Mr A is a nice guy but cheats on his girlfriend/partner/whatever. Though Mr A may say that its nature and you can't fight nature..I still believe that even though the music is on, you can always turn it down, or turn it off...and please, kaya nga survival of the fittest eh, if you can't adapt to new situations, you'll go extinct..and life is always at k, some level of chaos at all times. I could go on and on about this but I wont. Enough said that you can always turn the music off.

Exhibit B. Ms. B doesn't want to hear the music. She'd rather act oblivious to it so that life is more simple...personally I think she is too afraid to hear it because she would probably have to act on it.

and finally..

Exhibit me. Exhibit me hears the music, but sometimes I don't know what to do with it..sometimes (in retrospect because retrospect is always 20 20 vision as my father always says) i think there are times that I should have just turned it off, sometimes when I should have stopped to listen to it and acknowledge it, and sometimes I should have turned it up..hopefully with age I have gotten better at knowing when to do what..we'll just have to see.

note: I think I should start writing movie reviews or something less personal..I always seem to analyse myself